THE BROKEN CANNOT HEAL THE BROKEN
Scrolling through my Instagram feed I once came across a post that read something along the lines of “People go to therapy to heal from the people who needed therapy but never went.” I’m pretty sure I just butchered that but you get the idea. It’s basically the saying, “if you don’t heal what hurt you, you will bleed on people who didn’t cut you.”
We know this, but what we often forget is that sometimes if not most times, we are in this together. People are broken together, in their own ways of course, but together. And broken people can not heal each other. They can try, but if they are broken by the same thing, cause, person, a co-dependent healing relationship simply cannot thrive.
Growing up how and where I have, I have seen this happen time and time again. I too have fallen into this toxic cycle a few times, unintentionally but sometimes knowing exactly what I doing. I understand why we do it. It’s love and/or empathy. We are human and we can’t escape that, but the sooner we realized that sometimes the best way to help someone is not to be the one who tries to “fix” them, the better.
Sometimes it must not be you who gives your shoulder to your loved one. Sometimes it needs to be their own two feet and someone else’s shoulder.
This too is an act of love. An act that is harder but much more hopeful.
